sexta-feira, 26 de dezembro de 2014

THE UGLY ODALISK

THE UGLY ODALISK
Our story starts when Hume takes the ugly Odalisk to meet his family in Lebanon. They had been engaged for two years already and his love for her had just grown since.
He never regretted everything he gave up for her, his life with Malena and his prestige as a businessman. He decided to become a Middle East correspondent in New York and took the ugly Odalisk along with him, for them to live their dream of loving each other together.
The ugly Odalisk refrained herself from meeting his family, at first. She was very ugly and her past was suspicious. She was afraid about what they would think of her. But he argued it was time that they understood the Western culture and that his choices were a part of the New World's lifestyle.
As they slept together on the night before the flight, she had nightmares and murmured some words....He woke up. "Honey, did you say something?" "Can't we postpone the trip?"  "They are all waiting for us now. I'm sure they'll love you and considering how much they miss me I'm certain they won't even notice you're there....!"
"I doubt that. But, yes, you're right, we don't have a choice now."
The trip was long and tiring. The airplane went through tough turbulance, Talita wanted to throw up several times. But she was an ugly Odalisk and ugly Odalisks have strong stomachs. She closed her eyes tight and held Hume's hand. He caressed the back of her hand and said "It'll be alright. Trust me."
The connection in Egypt was on a Friday so they decided to stay until Saturday night to walk around the capitol. Hume tried to calm Talita down several times, but she was very uneasy. As they walked alongside the hot and beige Cairo, she sighed with a low voice "They are going to speculate about how we met, they'll want to know who I am.....And they loved Malena, she is the beautiful and talented singer. As for me, what do I have to offer? I am as blend as a band-aid!" Hume held her face, remembered her that it was just one week away from home, then everything would be good and safe again, but it didn't seem to be enough. She bit her lip and gave a deep breath. So Hume took her by the hand and dragged her really fast, crossing all the city so fast that she nearly fell with her knees down on the sandy ground. When they arrived at their cheap hotel room, he did that to her again: he kissed her cheek, his fingers on her neck and the others slipping down her belly and into her panties, his hands were all over her, as if he had six arms. She was silent for a while, then she slowly opened her mouth and a sound was heard for three minutes, non-stop. She laid, he laid by her side and said: "Just be yourself. I love you and I know why, don't worry. Okay?" "Okay...."

The plane arrived in Beirut, his family was there: father, brother and one cousin. There was major celebration upon seeing him. Hugs, shake of hands, loud whispers. She stood behind, holding her carry-on and looking down. Seven minutes later, he introduces her to his brother: "Alef, this is Talita" "Welcome to our country! Do you like shopping?" She answered politely: "Yes, indeed...." "Maja has wonderful places to show you, then! Come, come!" (the cousin, in Arabic: "She is even uglier than I thought!" the father: "Don't say things to hurt your uncle's feelings!" the brother: "She may be your aunt someday...." Father: "We'll have to see about that" Hume and Talita were walking calm ten feet behind).
As they arrived at the house, there was big noise among all the family. Talita was relieved because she seemed invisible and that was very different from everything she lived in New York, where she was the core of all attention. Their relationship had a giant repercussion and that was what all people around her would talk about.

After nearly one hour of catching up, the old uncle stopped talking Arabic and asked Hume, in English:

"Where is that nice girl your sister met in your house when she was in America? I saw her picture, you were in Central Park" the aunt: "She was so beautiful! And I heard she is very famous in America too!" Talita looked down. Hume went by her side, smiled and answered, firmly: "We separated because Talita and I, well, we are getting married in a couple of months." The aunt "Who is Talita???" The cousin (in Arabic) "The ugly one!"

Everybody laughs. "This is Talita", says Hume. The sister "Are you a singer, too?"

"No, I am a writer"

"And can I buy anything you've published at a bookstore around here?"

"I fear not. Not yet"

"Oh, I see."

"So tell us, Hume, why did you decide to bring this girl all the way over here? You could have taken her as a wife in America...."

"Talita is a big admirer of the Arabian culture. She is a very good Belly dancer, too."

"Have you seen her dancing?"

"I used to present myself with a group, from the school where I learned...."

(the mother, speaking for the first time since Hume arrived, in Arabic): "Hume, I don't believe you left that beautiful Western singer for an Odalisk! And she isn't even an Arabian!"

And the mother goes into the house. Hume goes after her.

Jamila, the cousin, approaches Talita "Don't worry, Talita. You will have the chance to show them why Hume loves you so much. Hume is an intelligent man, they all know that. And they know inside their hearts that he wouldn't bring you here if you weren't special. I'll take you to your room."

The room they reserved for Talita had a bathroom with a bath and a big mirror. Talita looks herself on the mirror "They are right. I am very ugly...." She takes a shower and goes to sleep.

In the morning, everyone is sitting upon the breakfast table and Hume goes to Talita's room to accompany her to breakfast. When they arrive at the dining room, they are discussing: "Who was that?" "I think it came from the guest room...." "Me too!" "But it is impossible, it was in Arabic!" They sit at the table. The uncle --  "Hume, tell me....has Talita been taking Arabic lessons?" "No, uncle, she never wanted to learn." "So why was she screaming Arabic words last night?" "Er...I think....she was having nightmares, right Talita?" "Yes, yes! I don't realize but I say some things sometimes...."

They all thought that was suspicious, but they decided not to mention a thing about it.

The next morning they were discussing the same thing again over breakfast. They decided to investigate how she learned such advanced Arabic words....

They spent the whole day out in the city. At night, the family gathered for dinner. The men were discussing politics and the situation of Libya.
Talita murmured a word in Arabic. The brother "Excuse me. What did you say??"

"Uhn, nothing...Just, well, the tabloids!"

"Talita, this is not a conversation for you." - Hume

"No, no. I want to hear" - the Uncle

The women started to giggle.

"Well, this entire conflict in the Middle East....People in the West are not aware that the Business of News creates the battles through tabloids for Political purposes and oil speculation. And there is the speculation of fire weapons also. The factories are everywhere in Africa too. It's sad. And the situation in Africa is even worse because besides the war they have the starvation and the diseases....No one talks about African conflicts in America, it is a forgotten continent. Africa's economy runs around cell phones, it is so backwards, considering their potential for arts and fashion, if they just had the media for it. And it is such a shame because Africa could be a powerful market if the rest of the world could find a way to reach to them. But this African liberation will just happen when the oil speculation is more democratic, that is, when the West allows the owners of the oil to have all profit from their land, so that the money will be able to have free flow. I still don't understand why the White world is so angry and jealous of the Dark society. All dark society has been kept hostage by them....: the Chinese, the Indian, the Africans, the Arabians, Brazil….! Are they jealous of our culture, our intelligence, our detachment from the system, our gorgeous women? I wouldn't know. But I hear the scream of the dark refugees:
Leave us be! Leave us to our culture!"

"True. But, Talita, we keep polemic subjects to men here." - the brother.
(Talita, in Arabic) "Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to....Oh!"
(Aunt, in Arabic) "Again? She is answering back! How dare, she!"
Big noise, in Arabic....Talita goes out of the house to the back yard. Hume goes after her: "Please, be calm. They are not going to change how I feel for you. You complete me, in my work, as a man. And you are talented too,  everybody in the city knows that. Just four more days, okay? And don't say things. Keep them to yourself.  It is going to be a good exercise for you too." "I don't know if I can." "Alright, I didn't want to, but I have to tell you something...The reason why I brought you here wasn't exactly to make our relationship formal. I don't care for what they think, this is why I left here in the first place! There have been threats" "What??"

"Yes. Threats. They say you are loud and your political opinions are hurting their stability. You see, most people don't know these things and when you make them heard on the bus, or on your blog, the big ones get mad. It is dangerous for me too, I am an important journalist! Now, tell me the truth: Are you learning Arabic?" "I was taking basic word lessons with a girl over Skype. Why?" "Please, try not to. They don't like it" (Talita, in Arabic) "I'm sorry" "Talita, please." "What?" "You are doing it again" "Oh, no....I just don't realize. I want to go home, please!" "We can't back down now. You have to learn how to control yourself"

She cries. He holds her.

On the next day, Maja takes Talita to the market. Talita takes U$300,00 and buys all sorts of beautiful things.  Maja gets surprised on her ability to shop "Why don't you work with decoir or something alike?" "I don't know, I don't have much money to invest" "Maybe after you've met the family they will want to help you with a new career"

"Maybe."

When they arrive home, the women gather together to see what she's bought. Jamila - "Where are the clothes and shoes and jewelry?" She had just bought material for artcraft. Talita - "Come here, Jamila. I want to teach you how to make a necklace."

They start to work on artcraft and Talita starts to tell her story, her trips through all America as a low-budget artist and the many adventures she had been through. The following days went by like that. As the men would go for business in town, Talita and Jamila sat for artcraft and stories. The other women would sit around pretending they were doing something, just to listen to them. Talita also taught Jamila songs that she had written herself.

At night, the women would tell the stories and the songs to their husbands and they asked the wives to listen more on the following day.
It had been 10 days since they had arrived and the family didn't want to let them go home. Hume was starting to become impatient and so was Talita. One morning, the family was waiting for them at the breakfast table and they showed up with the suitcases.

"We wanted to announce that we are leaving. Talita wants to spend a week in London and I have to go back to work too"

(the Uncle, in Arabic) "You can't go now. You have to stay a little longer"

(the brother, in Arabic) "He is right, Hume. The women have taught Talita too many things and she has strong political ideas. It is dangerous for her and for you."

(the mother, in Arabic) "Oh, my son barely comes through the door and he wants to return to that horrible land! I will not let you leave this time!"

(the father, in Arabic) "If you came back to leave your mother like this you had better not to have come visit!"

(Hume, in Arabic) "Please, don't do this. I won't stay not even one day longer. We have to go (in English, to Talita) Let's go!"

(the cousin, in Arabic) "She can't go!"

(Hume, in Arabic) "Why not?"

(the cousin, in Arabic) "I have her passport!"

(Hume, in Arabic) "No, It's not true"  (in English, to Talita) "Where is your passport?"

Talita goes through her things "I can't find it!"

(Hume is in loud murmured tears, in Arabic) "Where is it?"

(cousin, in Arabic) "If you want to go, go! It is too dangerous for her"
The taxi cab arrives at the door:

(the brother, in Arabic) "Your taxi is here. Leave her with us for a couple of weeks. We know what is happening in your city, the conflicts because of her protests. We read her blog. We will teach her how to behave within the war."

The taxi honks its horn.

(the Uncle, in Arabic) "You have to go. And she is very ugly for you anyways. You will be able to have more beautiful and talented women in America"

(Hume, in Arabic) "No, don't do that! Please!"

The taxi driver enters the house, takes the luggage and the purses.
Talita - "Hume, what's happening??"

(cousin, in Arabic) "Your suitcases are already in the car. You have to go now."

(brother, in Arabic) "I'll go with you. Come." He takes Hume by the arm.

(Hume, in English) "I love you. I'll be back for you"
"Please, Hume, don't leave me here! Don't....please....." - Talita

(brother, in Arabic) "Let's go!"

(mother, in Arabic) "They are taking my son away from me again, all because this ugly dancer!"

Hume enters the car and cries deeply.

For the following three weeks, Hume writes Talita emails and telegrams, but he gets monosyllables as an answer. His family says she's fine, but they don't want her to be in danger. They say that if he has chosen a life like this, Talita shouldn't be harmed for that and that if he really loved her, he would let her stay with them.

So Hume got depressed and cried for hours every day. He wasn't eating or working.

A month after he had returned, he received a letter from England. He opened and he discovered it was Jamila who had written it, from Lebanon and asked a friend in England to forward it. It said:

"Dear Hume, I know you were forced to leave Lebanon back to America. But you have to understand what Talita is going through here. They are treating her as an enemy. They never speak English around her, and when she tries to speak Arabic with them, they are rude to her. They don't allow us to talk anymore, I was her only friend.

And now, I think they want to fix her a marriage. They set a date next Tuesday for her to dance. They bought her a beautiful pink dancing outfit and many single men will be there, including your brother. You have to do something because you love each other. Please, hurry!"

Of course Hume went desperate.

And he started to remember the first times they spent together, all those days working at the office, talking and exchanging smiles. How much she had grown! He remembered all both of them gave up to be together and why he loved Talita so much. She had the skill to make anyone love her. Actually, he knew this is why they didn't let her come with him. They had fallen in love with her too.

So he decided to have this people who loved her so much to help him have her back. Until then, he had kept this problem a secret because the Arabic world already had too many problems and he didn't want his family to be the reason of another scandal. But now he realized that this pride was stupid and that he had to come clean with his people. He published the following note on all major newspapers and sent it as a chain to heads of newspapers and magazines all over the world. He also made an youtube video with the same content.

"Talita, my true love is not home. Talita has been captured as a princess. But she is my queen and her place is among those who love her, the American people. I won't remind you of all the times she cheered us up with giggles and jokes on the backstage, because those times were countless. By the way, she has been on the backstage for an option too, because she is talented and caring. I gave up many things to be with her. As my family says she is too Arabian for me - I am Lebanese and she is Brazilian - I just want you to help me exercise what I have chosen. America is the place where choices happen, we are a Free country. Help me have her back. I don't want conflict, I don't want blood. She is all about love. I want you to say in a 45 second youtube video why Talita has to come back to America. Please be sure to do that before Saturday. They are finding her a husband, a real Arabian husband, on Tuesday. Thank you all!"

The video was broadcasted in all major tv news all over America. As a result, every two hours 12 videos were posted on youtube. This was the first youtube petition of the History.
Hume sent all the links to Lebanon Media and took a plane to Beirut. As he arrives at the house, just Maja is there.

(Hume, in Arabic) "Where are they?"

"Talita got very sick and they had to take her to the hospital"

"Take me there"

They arrive at the hospital and Hume gets to see her.

(Hume, in Arabic) "Leave me alone with her" - firm and loud.

"Talita, it's me!"

Her eyes, full of happy tears.

"Don't say anything. I am so sorry, it was my fault! You never wanted to come in the first place and I should have never left you here! I was such a coward! This is how I've always stood when it comes to you. I was never brave enough to admit that you are what I always expected from any person. And I heard everybody giving opinions about why we shouldn't be together.....I never helped you! I never stood by your side. And you chose me anyway. I am so sorry, and I would understand if you would never forgive me...."

"Just take me home, ok?"

Hume grabs a nurse by the arm

(Hume, in Arabic) "Listen, she is a famous American writer and a wonderful dancer too. She lost her passport.  Can you call the American embassy?"

(the nurse) "Why don't you call yourself, sir?"

(Hume) "For the same reason why I couldn't call them a month ago when I had to return to the USA and left my fiancée here without a passport. Will you call them, please?"

(the nurse) "Oh, please wait here with her, sir. I'll keep the others outside. Whatever  you do, don’t leave the room"

Forty-five minutes later, the embassy arrives.

"Talita, what happened" - they ask


"I lost my passport at the market last week while I was shopping for material for artcrafts. I didn't have time to solve this problem because we were preparing for my big presentation tonight. But I fear I won't be able to present because I feel really ill. I just want to go home!"

"It’s okay. Listen, I just got the news that you have been released from hospital. I'll take you and Hume a room in a nice hotel near the Embassy and you'll be on a plane in two days. Don't worry. You are safe now.”

"Thank you. I could not be happier"

Holding hands on the plane, back to America.

“Mission accomplished. They didn’t find out…..”

“They knew it all along.”

“I don’t know. At least now you are a famous American refugee hero.
By the way, thank you for not placing a formal complaint at the Embassy….!”

“Your family is good people. They were kind and respectful all along. It is just that I wasn’t one of them…..yet! They were working on that when you arrived. You….an youtube petition!”

"Yes. Are you going to write about all this? I can find you an editor!”

"Oh, now you can find me an editor! No, no….better not. I am retired from being a blogger. Ugly strippers run a safer business."

Laughters.

How Hume and Talita started dancing

HOW HUME AND TALITA STARTED DANCING

Hume was Talita's boss at the office and his dream was to see her dancing for him, because her body was really beautiful. But he was engaged with Malena and besides, Talita was underage and society would put him into trouble.
The destiny diverged the two of them for many years and 9 years later Hume decides to bring her back to his life: he builds a beautiful studio to have her dancing for him.
They become best friends and discuss about love, politics, society, relationship....every week.

But Malena gets very jealous....

She decides to record an album and becomes a singer, so that she can expose Talita as an opportunist who's trying to steal her husband from her. Talita gets ashamed and sad, because she hadn't had intimacy with Hume so far.

Hume is proud of Malena, and gets away from Talita for a while. Talita tries to understand, after all, she is just a friend.

One year goes by without Talita having notice of Hume.

One day, Talita calls Hume and he says he wants to see her. She goes to the studio and it is like if they had been sharing the same house for years. Talita feels happy and strong.

But then, Malena gets really mad and decides to do something about it.

She opens a dance school in the name of a dancer called Surya and introduces her to Hume. Surya dances for him and they make love. Malena is not all but content with what she did, she takes Talita's poems from her blog and have Surya publish as her own, by paying the publication and finding her an editor.

Hume thinks Surya is very talented and starts to have an affair with her.

Meanwhile, everybody in the media is saying bad things about Talita and she cannot work anywhere. Her poems have been published by another person, Hume is sleeping with this woman and she gets really depressed.

Talita starts to meditate and practice yoga, loses weight and buys new clothes. But Hume doesn't answer the phone.

One day, Surya stops Talita at the subway and asks her to work in her school as a teacher. She says it's her only option to make a living.

Talita refuses. She says: we are not the ruler of our hearts, but we can ordain our judgement. I am not going to be your employee because I know who you are. Please don't headhunt me.

Surya gets angry and decides to follow Talita around, to headhunt her for her school.

One day, Hume is entering the subway and his way crosses Talita's. They go for a walk, talk, laugh and almost kiss. Surya is following Talita and sees them.

When Hume arrives home, Surya confronts him about what she saw. And Hume thinks it is too big a coincidence that the two girls have met him by chance at the same time, so he makes her confess that she is headhunting her and the reason is because Malena is the owner of her school, who gave her the poems to publish. The poetry belongs to Talita and now she doesn't have anything, a house, food or a job. So Malena wants her to work for her. In fact, they just wanted to humiliate Talita.

Hume gets really sorrowful and ashamed, he had been unfair to Talita and there is nothing he could do to repair his error.

Talita, who is also a singer decides to work in a call center. She knows she will lose her voice under the air-conditioning but she doesn't have an option.

So Hume, though a rich businessman decides to apply for the same position as her and earn minimum wage. He makes a scheme not to be discovered and gets the job.

Talita is having her picture taken at the human resources when she listen to a melody in her heart. She looks and Hume is there, with his documents for admission.

They share a few words. He says: "Call me Leo while I am here, ok?" She says: "Let's open an English company together?"

"I've been through it. Malena and I are business partners. I just wanted to have a reason to see you again"

"I want you in my life. They are not treating me right. Please call me?"
Hume thought Talita was very beautiful and decided to do something about their future. Together.

He doesn't call her, just observes her from the distance.

She is suffering because of another man, who was unjust to her. Her friends have all abandoned her and one day after she has assumed position at the call center she has to give up because the air conditioning gives her sinuses and asthma. She couldn't sleep or talk because of the asthma. She was sad because she couldn't sing. And because she would never see Leo again.

He didn't call.

She spent one year teaching few students and making 200 per month. At the end of the year, she got admission in the university. She called Hume to tell him about the news. He decided to take her out to celebrate. He said she could choose whatever she wanted to do.

She chose a hotel on a Saturday evening with aircraft market on Sunday. Did they make love? I think they just held each other and kissed. But what I know for a fact is that they've been together since as best friends with benefits.

He trusts her more than anything. And she loves him as some sort of Saviour sent from Destiny....


Read http://www.recantodasletras.com.br/contos/4029946 and learn what happens next....


Kelly Cow and the Bull (for the children)

Once upon a time there was beautiful cow named Kellly. One day, Kelly went to the valley with her mammal friends and she got lost. She walked and walked but couldn't find the way back to her shephard. So, the worst happened: she went up the hill and faced the abyss. She was really afraid because she didn't know how to turn back, so she started to say her mother's name. When the bull heard the mooing, he felt sorry for her and had to make a difficult decision: horn her onto the abyss, because this agony would be smaller than waiting to die from starvation facing the abyss or suicide. Kelly understood what happened and got really afraid. So she asked her mother to call her father. And The Father apperaed, from the abyss, wearing a very colourful outfit and he had a flag in his hand. Kelly asked: "Who are you?" and the Father answered, in Spanglish: "Yo soy Mr Toreador, el Padre that te going to salvar". Padre Toreador hypnotised the bull made him turn away. Kelly felt the danger go away, but she was still in trouble. So, she asked the Father: "Mr Toreador, and how about me? I am facing the abyss."

El Padre said: "I'll help you out of here the same way I helped him not to harm you" And taught her how to turn away.

Many cows are going through the same situation nowadays, because they are born to die in the the slaughterhouse. When they come to this world, their spirit many times think they will be humans, but they are cows. And they remember life as a human.
Brethren, let's practice yoga, dance, sports, to exercise our humanity. And also, let's not practice violence to other animals because El Toreador was a God who helped the bull, not a torturer. Let's be vegetarians?

Por: Nanda Moraes (or Thai)

Nuvem e Palhaço (Para as Crianças)

Os pais acham difícil explicar de onde vêm os bebês a seus filhos.
Mas eles sabem.
Prova disso é que nenhuma criança, independente da idade, gosta de ver seus pais com outros cônjuges. Eles entendem, mas as mães sofrem.....

- Iriêma, páre de chorar.....
- Eu não quero que ela seja minha babá!
- Mas por que não, ela é uma boa pessoa.....
- Ela vai roubar o papai de você!
- Mas seu pai e eu já estamos separados....
- Eu sei!

Iriêma, querida, não fique assim..... Seu papai e sua mamãe te amam demais..... Demais mesmo. Foram eles que fizeram uma reunião de negócios seríssima somente à dois e à portas fechadas para você vir parar nesse mundo..... Faça o seguinte, você tem mesa em casa? Não? E chão, você tem chão em casa? Não ria, muitas crianças não tem chão em casa, seus lares são tocas de chão de barro. Não precisa ficar triste por elas também; elas são felizes do jeito delas. Todas as crianças, como você, tem uma capacidade incrível de sentirem-se felizes só por estarem neste mundo, é por isso que gostamos de ficar perto delas. Às vezes até irrita um pouco..... Mas quando vocês olham para nós vocês lembram de onde vocês vieram, vocês lembram-se Dele. Vocês lembram-se de como vocês se sentiam enquanto eram arquitetadas naquela reunião de negócios secreta. E vocês se sentem muito felizes por estarem aqui, perto de nós. Tome esta folha e esse lápis de cor. Sente-se no seu chão e desenhe o que você quiser pensando em duas palavras: Cloud e Clown. Você sabe o que significa? Significa nuvem e palhaço. Você já reparou que o cabelo do palhaço parece uma nuvem? E que a nuvem chove às vezes? Você sabia que você tem uma nuvem em cima do seu olho, e quando você fica triste ela faz você chorar? Isso se chama glândula, faz parte do seu corpo, fica aqui, ó. Por isso pegue essa folha, não chore mais, e faça um desenho: Cloud e Clown.....

- O que significa mesmo, tia Tara?

- Nuvem e Palhaço.....

All my luv

Thais Fernanda Ortiz de Moraes

A HISTÓRIA DE CASANOVA

Duas amigas conversando:

- Quer dizer que você não conhece a história do Casanova?
- Já ouvi falar, era um cara aí que tinha muitas mulheres....
- É. Mas você sabe por que?

Queriam provar que câmeras eram nocivas à sociedade, como todo novo advento da humanidade.

"Mas se sacarem fotos de nossas mulheres nuas? E mostrarem a todos?"

"Quem faria isso? O marido é você, e você já deve ter visto uma porção de vezes..."

"Ele é corno!"

"Eu bem que gostaria de ver umas fotos da minha esposa nua."

"Eu é que não gostaria de ver da sua!"

"Minha esposa é muito boa, obrigado!"

"Mas ela é enorme!"

"Sem roupa ela é muito bonita. E faz movimentos incríveis com aquela corpulência...."

"Isso é o que eu queria ver"

"Então, esta espécie de câmera saca fotos de movimentos também?"

"Há quem diga que sim."

"E quem está dominando os primeiros experimentos?"

"Um tal de....Casanova"

"Nunca ouvi falar!"

"Ele está aqui?"

"É o codinome dele. Ninguém sabe quem ele é na verdade"

"Como assim. Onde ele mora?"

"Essa é a questão. Ele não tem casa fixa."

"E quem gostaria de viver sem uma casa fixa?"

"Por sexo com NOSSAS mulheres homens solteiros de meia idade são capazes de tudo."

"Menos com a do Roberto"

"Já falei que minha mulher é bonita nua!"

Eles se entreolham, meio-riso e olham para baixo.

Entra um homem pela porta:

"Ela é bonita de qualquer jeito" - CASANOVA

"É você então! O homem da revistaria!"

"Não disse isso!" - CASANOVA

"Você saiu com a esposa de Roberto a troco de quê então?"

"Ela é bonita, oras!" - CASANOVA

Roberto, rindo

"Corno!"

"É que eu também acho isso!"

"Que és corno?"

"Não. Que minha esposa é muito linda. E que vocês todos tem desejo por ela! Por que então ficam comentando sobre as anáguas de certa Lolla? Somente mulheres enormes usam aquele tipo de anáguas"

"Ora, vocês copulam de janela aberta, então miramos!"

"Vocês não tem nada que olhar!"

"Essa é a questão" - diz o homem da revistaria - "Se vocês já se observam transando, qual o problema de sacarmos fotos?" - CASANOVA

"É que nós observamos as outras sem tocá-las"

"E quando dormem com suas mulheres, estão pensando em quais?" - CASANOVA

"Então como há fotos delas circulando pela cidade?"

"Aquelas são nossas mulheres???"

"Nós acreditamos que sim. E são muito verossímeis para serem pinturas"

"Bem, são mulheres bonitas. Nós conversamos, bebemos, fumamos cigarros e sacamos fotos. O tipo de coisa que fazemos na revistaria. Mulheres também gostam disso e são bem mais inteligentes que seus maridos pensam." - CASANOVA

"Mas....elas sabem uma da outra?"

"Tive muita preocupação com isso." - CASANOVA

"Como você faz para não perceberem então?"

"Levo cada uma a uma casa." - CASANOVA

"E quantas casas você tem?"

"Meu padrasto era do ramo imobiliário" - CASANOVA

"Elas nunca desconfiaram?"

"Elas sabem." - CASANOVA

"Como?"

"Um dia, Mariana chegou animada a peluqueria, dizendo que havia encontrado um homem que gostava de cigarros. Suzen falou: - Quem te deu cigarros??? E Rebeca tossiu. Daí, todas se confessaram" - CASANOVA

"Como não ficamos sabendo de nada???"

"Mulheres sabem manter sigilo quando querem permanecer com algo em sua vida." - CASANOVA

"Elas sabem que estão lhe sacando fotos? Como lhes explicou?"

"No início, não."-CASANOVA

"Então, como descobriram?"

"Eu imaginei que a história toda dividiria elas. Mas só serviu para uni-las. Elas ficavam me perguntando? Você fez "aquilo" com ela? À princípio, eu achava que era sobre sexo e assegurava a todas que nenhuma das coisas que acontecia em uma casa, se repetia na outra, pois cada mulher era diferente uma da outra!"-CASANOVA

"Você dormiu com elas então?!!!"

"Bem, depois falamos sobre isso! A questão é, "aquilo" que elas mencionavam eram as fotografias! Estavam interessadas em mim, somente pelas fotografias!"-CASANOVA

"Por que mais seria então?"

"Depois voltamos neste assunto. O que quero dizer, é que, elas não tem ciúmes dos maridos ou das outras. Elas tem ciúmes de si mesmas!"-CASANOVA

"Como nós!"

"Elas são duplamente amadas então?"

"Já viste uma mulher manipular-se?" -CASANOVA

"Ahn....bem, acho que sim."

"Bem, eu já vi muitas, e te digo, elas fazem de um jeito muito mais voraz que quando estão conosco!"-CASANOVA

"Você viu as nossas mulheres manipularem-se?"

"A minha que não foi!"

"A minha não faz esse tipo de coisa nem para mim"

"E a Carla?"

"Deixe a Carla em paz!"

"Ei, você tirou fotos da Carla fazendo isso????"

"Não vamos falar vamos falar sobre isso agora!" - CASANOVA

"E por que você?"

"Pensem comigo, vejo desenhos na revistaria desde que era muito menino. A revistaria era de meu avô, que deu a meu pai e de quem herdei. Conheço todos os tipos de pessoas e sou um homem muito culto para conversar sobre todos os tipos de assuntos pois leio muito todos os dias. Precisamos conversar com as mulheres para fazê-las sentirem-se bonitas." - CASANOVA

"Então, acho que isso não nos perturba."

"Como assim, não querem matar-me?" - CASANOVA

"É que elas estão do jeito que as imaginamos quando estamos com elas intimamente, mira?"

"Sim, são muito mais bonitas nas fotos que você tira e gostamos de imaginar nossas mulheres assim."

"Bem, então tenho permissão da sociedade para sacar fotos públicas?"-CASANOVA

"Como assim?"

"Quero tornar-me repórter e jornalista" - CASANOVA

"Vai sacar fotos de quê?"

"Da sociedade, baseado nas coisas que ouço vocês conversarem aqui." - CASANOVA

"E se for um segredo nosso?"

"Não quero fotos minhas circulando!"

"E como não se importa que circule as das suas mulheres?"-CASANOVA

"Quero que saibam como ela é bonita!"

"Todos já não a vêem?"-CASANOVA

"Mas eu pensava que não a achavam bonita."

"Será que é você que não a acha bonita sem roupa?"-CASANOVA

"Por que pensaria isso?"

"São vocês quem estão dizendo! Olham uns aos outros a transar pela janela porque acham as outras bonitas. Mas as suas próprias, não as consideravam assim até vê-las nas fotografias. Sabe qual é o nome disso?"-CASANOVA

"Oh, não! Será que somos homossexuais????"

"Não. O nome disso é misoginia."-CASANOVA

"É como homossexuais??????"

"É bem pior que isso!"-CASANOVA

"Mas fale-nos sobre nossas fotos....sairemos bonitos como nossas mulheres?"

"Bem, no seu caso, acho que não é bem misoginia...."-CASANOVA

"Eu também quero ter uma foto minha em um jornal! Belo!"

"Vou mandar fazer um novo traje para a ocasião"

"Não são todos que poderão sair. E lembro vocês, de que isso não será um privilégio."

"Mas.....sobre nossas mulheres? Por que não vimos as fotos em que elas se auto-manipulam?"

"Manda uma da Carla para mim?"

"Por que da minha???" - Roberto

(Homossexualismo não é nenhum problema a se preocupar, não é problema algum, não é errado e é bonito, mas naqueles tempos havia um tabu muito maior que hoje. Eu sou heterossexual.)

O trem de Sicut

Na antiga província de Sicut havia um sério problema com a estação de trem. A estação fechava às 22hs e algumas pessoas não conseguiam sair da estação. Havia um pânico generalizado ao perceberem que não conseguiriam sair até o dia seguinte e o barulho dos trens que circulavam vazios pela noite a alta velocidade para manutenção era insano. Alguns se jogavam na linha, outros entravam no túnel, alguns corriam pela estação e grudavam nos portões, um caos generalizado, como um zoológico.
Acontecia que, o governo de Sicut decidia aumentar as linhas de trem de forma degenerada e assim, não havia uma extensão das linhas para que ele pudesse circular a noite inteira.
Aos poucos, o trem foi encontrando medidas para que as pessoas pudessem ficar acerca da estação. À princípio fazia com que parasse um vagão em cada uma das estações por vez e desembarcasse na estação de Barca. Alguns monitores os ajudavam a sair do vagão e a encontrar a rua, pois o choque de estarem presos em uma estação e em um trem em alta velocidade era muito grande.
Em 1949, a companhia ferroviária de Sicut decidiu abrir uma biblioteca com máquinas de escrever e café (algo parecido com uma lan house) 24 horas dentro das estações. O governo também passou a pagar músicos para tocarem durante a noite nas estações, pianistas, guitarristas, artistas de rua, um por dia em cada estação, e assim, apesar dos trens não circularem das 22hs às 3h30 da manhã, as estações ficavam abertas e cheias de entretenimento neste período. Logo alguns restaurantes fast-food, padarias e flippers passaram a abrir próximos à estação de metrô, funcionando 24hs.
A cidade de Sicut voltou a chamar-se Quebab e fundou 3 dos principais bancos do mundo. Hoje ela é um patrimônio histórico da lenda urbana de efeito político.

There was a serious issue at the ancient province of Sicut's train station. The station would close at 10PM and some people wouldn't be able to leave the station before it closed. There was a generalized panic among those who were locked into the station because they knew they wouldn't be able to leave until the next day and the noise of the trains that circulated at night for maintanence at high speed made people easily insane. Some people would throw themselves at the rails, some would enter the tunnel, some would run along the station and attain to the closed gate, a true chaos, it looked like a zoo.
It happened, the government of Sicut decided to increase the train rails into a degenerate manner and then, there wasn't an extension of the rail lines so that it could circulate all night long.
Little by little, the Rail Co. started to find some means for people to be able to be around the station whenever this happened. At the beggining they would have a wagon to open at each one of the stations at a time and stop at  the station of Barca. Some monitores would help them to get off the wagon and to find the way out, because the shock for being locked into a train station and inside a high speed train was too big.
In 1949, the Sicut Rail Co. decided to open a library with typing machines and coffee (something resembling a locutorio, the shared computer open office where people play games, write, work, sing, dance for money also within the respective websites) 24 hours per day inside the train stations. The government also started to pay musicians to play during the night inside the train stations, pianists, guitarrists, street artists, one per day in each station, and then, besides the trains not to circulate between 10pm and 3hs30AM, the stations would be open and full of entertainment during this period. Soon, some fast-food restaurants, bakeries and flippers started to open near  the subway stations, working 24hs per day.
The city of Sicut returned to be called Quebab and founded 3 of the main banks of the world. Today it is the historical inheritance of the urban legend with a political effect.

Sushamana Tara Thai Istha Ananda Om - Thais Fernanda Ortiz de Moraes

sábado, 11 de outubro de 2014

Pride

When people learn how to be proud of you, they don't ever harm you, rape you or insult you. They only care and contribute.

Sushamana Tara Thai

Dear South Africa - NEW!

Dear South Africa,
In Brazil, we make our home made coffee with paper filter and filter holders. We have a very famous branch for this segment called Melitta. I have observed at the market place and grocery stores an advertisment at the pictures onto the paper filter for AROMA MAX MELITTA ORIGINAL 102 AND 103, but the Mellita glass jars, the plastic holder and the eletric holder that are advertised, haven't been in the market yet. (I like to call the eletric holders "dacks" because it rhymes with docks, as the Afro-Afra blacks in Brazil are slaved in the docks and in the decks of the shores and harbour and also because the coffee comes always by ship).

So I would like to hear from you to know which congressman in your political department is responsible for the import and export of the country, so that you can contact Melitta.Co through our government and buy the stocks for AROMA MAX ORIGINAL 102 AND 103, so that these products from the catalogue will be available for Brazil and Africa (the filter holders and glass jars by Melitta). Also, I believe it is time you have a larger amount of stocks at the Brazilian coffee shares. Would you maybe request a tv commercial teaching how to make the Brazilian typical home made coffee so that you would create a demand for the product we have to offer. Moreover we can agree on having a combined proposal to sell rates for coffee and etanol (natural fuel from the soy beans), for the rikshaws tha you could buy in the BRICS agreement from India, for Safaris. Later on maybe, you would be able to buy the machines from the German to crop your own soy beans and have your usines as well  as selling the biodiesel from Castrol  (BRICS-Brazil / recycled cans and plastic bottles, Etanol and gasoline in a formula) for the German trucks (not to mention the contact center you may implement in the cities which have Kibutz Picks for the people there to work. The Kibutz picks would be turned into cities instead of picking for cotton. You see, it is cheap to build a Contact Center but the city that sustains it is expensive to be supported.

I also would like to see TV Programs made by your television in Brazilian television. The kind of TV program I would like to see is: SOUTH AFRICA HAS REALIZED THAT.... / SOUTH AFRICA LEARNED THAT..... / and SOUTH AFRICA WANTS TO KNOW.... / about philosophy, music, culture, and post cold war generation. I want speculation onto the influence of India's culture all over the world after the Cold War, from the 80's and on.

I LOVE YOU AFRICA!

ATT,

Thais (Sushamana Tara Thai)

quarta-feira, 8 de outubro de 2014

COMO VEJO O PANORAMA BRICS 2018

STOCKS IN BOVESPA PARA SOUTH AFRICA FOR THE AROMA MAX  102 e 103 MELITTA WITH THE MELITTA FILTERHOLDER BOTH PLASTIC AND ELETRIC AS WELL AS THE GLASS JAR BY MELITTA

CAFÉ PREMIADO ABIC 500g
CAFÉ 3 FAZENDAS ABIC 500g    ------------   São Paulo
bRAZIlian COFEE IN AFRICA, Starbucks in South Africa and by 2019 in cities where once there were the Kibutz picks


Margarina Cleybon compra 36 quotas da Kibon pela Bovespa

MARGARINA CLEYBON (PARA GHEE) ASSUME O PROJETO DE CUNHO ASIÁTICO (CORÉIA?) PARA A ENTREGA DE 280 GELADEIRAS DE AÇAÍ JUNDIÁ A SER VENDIDO JUNTO COM CHANTIBON - PARA TOMAR JUNTO - JUNDIÁ COM CHANTIBON. SERÂO CONSUMIDOS NO MÉXICO. ESTE PROJETO TEM COMO OBJETIVO A CONSTRUÇÃO DE NAVIOS EM CONJUNTO COM O TIGRE ASIÁTICO PELAS BOMBAS À VÁCUO DA EDWARDS VACUUM PARA A DESINTEGRAÇÃO DE PARTÍCULAS PLÁSTICAS A SEREM CONSUMIDAS PELA ÍNDIA - EM QUANTIDADES MODERADAS.

A compra das quotas da Kibon inclui a fórmula do Chantibon.

Em cidades habitáveis do México, USA onde não há Wall Mart, Rio Grande do Norte, Ceará e Rio das Ostras, sugiro o Market Sam's Club de patentes chinesas e chilenas e também Safeway Grocery Store.

CHRONOS ARREBATA SWATCH x 
CHROME ARREBATA MONT BLANC x 

WHOEVER IS ENTITLED TO: BUY 458 BAND-AID AXES FOR THE SAKE OF SELLING 500 labels of hellman's mayonnese and 1.000 hellman's glass (now that we are all consuming it under the plastic packaging) Acho que quem deve pagar por essa transação é a Itália ao enquadrar e punir os crimes descritos em http://tarafatosefilosofia.blogspot.com.br/2014_07_01_archive.html

PROJETO ÍNDIA

Shampoo
Condicionador
Produtos Rioquímica (Líquido de Dakin para banho em locais públicos e outros;)
Produtos Medicamentos ADV (Álcool 68,4% INPM para limpeza de locais delicados e outros;)
AMP Produtos terapêuticos LTDA.
Produtos Almeida Prado Ltda. (Medicamentos e pomadas)
Lavanda Trim para cabelos
Óleo Paixão (para corpo e cabelo)
Arnica
Calcinhas
Meias
Caneta esferográfica
isqueiro RGB nas bancas de jornal
livro Bhaktivedanta Book Trust
Frankincense (selling Frankincense from the Brazilian Taoist Society, which is more salty than the sweet Indian incense and it is perfect for domming the wild Indian dogs)
Polvilho Granado Powder (for armpits and also for domming wild Indian dogs and preventing them from having rashes)
Água Minalba
Intimate pads
lamp bulbs
Neocom doors for public showers (combination of manual public doors for showers)
Kalarayapatu inserido no MMA
Toalhas
Lençóis
edredons
colchões
Celulares de 1 chip bloqueado da LG
bulas - directions of usage (traduzidas pela África do Sul, patenteadas pelo Japão, emitidas em gráfica pelo Brazil e empacotadas pela coréia. Vendidas pela Índia, China, EUA e Genéricos pelo Brazil para o mundo inteiro)
Hangers
vaccines
backpacks (for the Indian children to sell the Dakin for cleaning in the trains)
glasses
ojas
CHEMICAL POWDER FIRE EXTINTORS (for desintegrating the street garbage)
mirrors
Bepantol
Vaselina Hospital das Clínicas
Sabão de coco em barra
White 70day-candles with 30 a pack for hospital days
Edwards Vacuum machines (that supported he cold war in the 80's and has solution for underground issues)

STOCKS IN BOVESPA PARA SOUTH AFRICA THE AROMA MAX MELITTA WITH THE MELITTA FILTERHOLDER BOTH PLASTIC AND ELETRIC AS WELL AS THE GLASS JAR BY MELITTA
CAFÉ PREMIADO ABIC 500g
CAFÉ 3 FAZENDAS ABIC 500g    ------------   São Paulo
bRAZIlian COFEE IN AFRICA, Starbucks in South Africa and by 2019 in cities qhere once there were the Kibutz


Tijoblocos em Paraíba

3 cadeiras BAHAUS  -----  Rio Grande do Norte / Fortaleza / Recife

Biodiesel Castrol ----------------------- Clientes da Contax Contact Center overseas
Almeida Prado
Rioquímica
etc

Nescau
Quaker
Qualitá
Itambé ----------------------------------- Clientes da Teleeprformance Contact Center overseas


TELEPERFORMANCE EM ZIP 97842 Mount Vernon - WA/USA para Spanyards to work ordering for Safeway in Mount Vernon.

(GTE for Spanyards' public phone 360-336-33-42 / Social Security for Spanyards in Mount Vernon/WA 6-326-97842)

CONTAX EM OREGON, NORTH CAROLINA, RIO GRANDE DO NORTE AND FOR CITIES IN AFRICA WHERE THE KIBUTZ ARE NOW.

TELLUS PERU AND BRASIL IN MATO GROSSO AND IN PERU

------------------------


CBA SOLUÇÃO EM BENEFÍCIO ALIMENTAÇÃO COMPRA 12 SHARES DE PREMIER ALIMENTOS (WOULD BENEFIT TO MAKE IT AVAILABLE)




ALWAYS ALOE VERA for Japanese girls in São Paulo and for citizens from Kansas who suffer from anorexia and also for ALL citizens of the world who suffer from resemblance of leukemia or other blood-related diseases.

HERBALIFE for Bellingham/WA citizens to sell for Texas citizens for weigh loss. These citizens might as well be welcome to study in Flint-Michigan at a Community College for monitors at the program in Kansas.

Demand for the Talco Mentolado and for the Pedra Hume (efeitos da doença da perna de Michael Jackson, também conhecida como ebola quando interno pode ser evitado com vaselina do HC
 (externo) e com xarope vick para casos na traquéia)

------------------

PENTE FINO nas empresas SafraNostra, CasaNostra e TerraNostra.

PENTE FINO nos sobrenomes de contas em banco e empresas abertas de combinações CAVVENNACCHI (CC/T/TT) E MENNECCHINNI - TODAS AS COMBINAÇÕES DE LETRAS REPETIDAS.

PENTE FINO nas empresas Atacadão Roldão (instrumentos roubados da Orquestra do estado de São Paulo para a seita Congragação), Conteminas (latifúndios de maconha abertos para membros da seita Congregação) e Aduaneiras (empresa de chip de Aeroportuários sem o devido treinamento na Alfândega - A Alfândega Brasileira chama-se SEA)

----------------

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN: South Africa buys an IT program for translating "bulas" - drug dosage and usage, prefferably bought it from Fortis IT on Gomes de Carvalho Street, São paulo-BR.




Seria possível um rainier preto da GAP de Burlington financiar uma loja GAP na Paulista? Para os mineirinhos que vivem dizendo que tem ações da GAP aqui, imagine! E faça questão de vender esse rainier lá, Thais Moraes luv hers!

0.25 DE QUOTAS DE ORÉGANO HIKARI VENDIDO A SAFEWAY EM TODO O TERRITÓRIO NORTE AMERICANO. 0.32 DE QUOTAS DE SODIUM CARBONATE ADV VENDIDOS EM TODO O ESTADO NORTE AMERICANO. E VENDIDOS EM ORÉGANO E EM SODIUM CARBONATE EM ESPÉCIE.


ALL THESE I PLEE TO THE GREAT AMERICAN SOCIETY ONTO THE PAC OPPORTUNITIES INTO THE BRICS. FOR US TO PROVIDE YOU TOGETHER SOLUTIONS FOR THE THREAD LINES AND BALL CONDUCTORS THAT MIGHT GUIDE THE ENERGY FROM THE USINES ALONG THE HIGHWAYS AND FREEWAYS TO THE CITIES THAT ARE GOING OUT OF ELECTRICITY, AS WELL AS BUILDING NEW CITIES FOR A NEW GENERATION TO COME AND WHEN FIND IT SUIT THE CITY OF LIGHTS MAY AS WELL RETRIBUTE THE GIFT AND SEND THE GOOD LIGHTS WE HAVE DOWNTOWN SÃO PAULO. THEY ARE SO LIGHT AND THEY USE NO ELECTRICITY WHATSOEVER. IT IS CHRISTMAS LIGHT BUT I WISH WE ALL COULD HAVE IT EVERY WEEKEND FROM WED-SUN!


a taxa alíquota será a transação de vertentes entre LojaGrow www.lojagrow.com.br X e Edwards Vacuum www.edwardsvacuum.com X 

Para contribuir comigo, basta um telefonema. Abra seu coração, faça uma aula de inglês por semana por 50 reais cada.

bjs,

thais

11-975700536    ACEITO PIX DO MÁXIMO DE PESSOAS POSSÍVEIS PELO MÁXIMO DE DIAS POSSÍVEL. BABA NAM KEVALAM.

terça-feira, 30 de setembro de 2014

O chip da questão - NEW!

As major qualifiers go against the GIP condition (and others make ammends to do use the GIP just to  be able to qualify), we must say that IT IS WRONG to commit crimes and do drug abuse under the coverage of a GIP. However, the GIP is not used to become a superhero in which quality it would be impossible to overcome the everyday obstacles and evolve, helping society to grow as they avoid real work into the system. The GIP is due and used cases of Genetic diseases (DNA modified in the GIP into a healthy DNA), as well as other types of diseases and also in case of drowning, backstabbing and kidnapping when people are dismissed from their identity or sense of life and need to recover.


Da mesma forma que a maioria vá contra o uso de GIP (e que outros sejam à favor simplesmente para que possam tirar vantagem desta condição), devemos dizer que É ERRADO cometer crimes e abuso de drogas sob roupagem do GIP. No entanto, o GIP não é usado para se tornar um super-herói tornando-se impossível superar os obstáculos do dia-à-dia e evoluir, ajudando a sociedade a crescer pois está evitando trabalho verdeiro nesta mesma sociedade. O GIP é devido e usado em caso d doenças genéticas (modificação do DNA no GIP para um DNA saudável), assim como outros tipos de doenças e também nos casos de afogamento, esfaqueamento pelas costas e sequestro, quando as pessoas são privadas de sua identidade ou senso de vida e precisam recuperá-las.

quinta-feira, 11 de setembro de 2014

PANORAMA DE DESENVOLVIMENTO DO ALUNO DE INGLÊS

As orientações neste post se incidem

Mas eu também me deixei iludir pelo padrão de qualidade da Ber****

Apesar de nunca ter trabalhado para eles,

Fiz divulgação de uma porcaria que eu nem conhecia porque o membro da igreja que eu estava frequentando levou meu currículo lá

Bobagens que se viraram contra mim


 PANORAMA DE DESENVOLVIMENTO DO ALUNO DE INGLÊS




PASSO 1

1 ano e meio CN*** ou Cel* l*** (verb to be, simple present e simple past bem fixados)



PASSO 2

1 ano e meio de aulas particulares comigo (minhas aulas são diárias e duram 30 minutos. Consistem na leitura de um texto para obter pronúncia, um exercício oral e um gramatical todos os dias. As aulas custam somente 5 reais por sessão online e são vendidas em pacotes de 10 aulas).



PASSO 3

2 anos de Wiz*** do livro 5 em diante para adquirir fluência



PASSO 4

- 2 anos de Berl***, o.nde o aluno consegue sua colocação no mercado de trabalho e seu diploma de aprendizado do inglês, ou 

-volta ao curso em Aulas Particulares para emitir certificado Internacional - TKT, FCE, TOEFL, TOEIC, etc

Eu substituiria o passo 4 pelo curso de graduação em Tradução e Interprete na Unino*** mesmo se for pelo EAD ou o curso da Alumni que também tem técnico em Tradução

PASSO 5

Por fim, o aluno deve fazer seu MBA na área de atuação;



ENTÃO?! SENTE-SE PRONTO À DAR O SEGUNDO PASSO, NA TRAJETÓRIA AO SEU MBA??? ADORARIA FAZER PARTE DESTE DESENVOLVIMENTO! ME LIGUE 55-11-9757-00-536 (VIVO) legacy.br.rdv@gmail.com

Telefone novo

11-9395-46-097

ATT. THAIS 

domingo, 25 de maio de 2014

Camareiras

As meninas que gostam de se aproveitar de homens tem jeito de travesti.

Não, travesti são bem legais. Eles são o máximo. Essas meninas gostosonas e truculentas que ficam aliciando homens por dinheiro tem porte de travesti e sujam a imagem deles.

Elas descobrem o telefone, endereço e empresa do homem rico ou bem-relacionado, normalmente com uma mulher bem-sucedida intelectualmente, o localizou através dela inclusive, através da dissimulação e vai até ele, força a transar com ela em troca de benefícios.

Se o homem disser que não quer transar com ela, e a paga para ir embora pois isso é um tipo de sequestro, ela diz que não sairá de sua casa, emprego, ou não abrirá a porta do local enquanto ele não transar com ela. Querem saber por que? Porque são elas que querem dar o preço do sequestro, e acham que só terão o direito de fazer isso se transarem com eles.

O homem, para quem o sexo é só sexo fala: tudo bem, nós transamos. Normalmente o sexo é ruim e elas os roubam sob o argumento de que quem gosta de sexo são os homens, por isso ela o forçou a transar com ele pelo dinheiro.

Eles ficam confusos, mas para se livrarem da situação, dão o que querem. Eles começam a ficar chateados, quando elas, para mantê-los em suas vidas começam à forçá-los a beber whiskey com cocaína se quiserem sair do local. O engraçado é que isso muitas vezes acontece antes de uma reunião de negócios e às vezes quem fez isso é a própria secretária do homem.

E quando o Berlusconi diz que a mulher que o prendeu no quarto de hotel não era uma camareira, perguntaram a ele como foi então que o prenderam no quarto?

Talvez ele tenha dito que de fato, ligou para o segurança e que iria processar o hotel, por tê-la deixado subir.

O hotel diz que ela pode ser uma hóspede e que ele não deveria tê-la deixado entrar.

Pode ser que ele tenha aberto a porta para ver quem era e ela entrou batendo a porta atrás dele.

E o hotel quer saber por que ele não abriu a porta e fez um escândalo?

Talvez não houvesse ninguém trabalhando naquele andar.

Mas e porque você não desceu para reclamar?

Eu teria que fazer minhas malas para ela não me roubar.

E porque você não nos ligou?

Estou ligando agora.

E como eu vou saber que você já não transou com ela, que chamou essa prostituta aqui no nosso hotel de família, não quer pagá-la e ainda por cima coloca a culpa em nós?

(Isso pode acontecer dentro da sua casa inclusive.
A vida imita arte e a arte imita a vida. Lembra-se da novela Avenida Brasil? A casa do jogador de futebol e de sua esposa "Carminha" era cheia de parentes. Ora e vez diziam que ela precisava se afastar, e ela ia para um sítio dormir no quarto de empregada, enquanto a família dele dava uma prostituta para ele "relaxar" um pouco. Isso é certo?)

Quando o executivo dá o argumento de que ele tinha reservado o quarto para ele e para a namorada, que não era ela, e que eles deveriam ter pedido o documento daquele traveco ridículo, eles dizem coisas do tipo: a namorada dele deveria estar tentando terminar com ele e mandou o traveco.

Quando ele diz que quem reservou o quarto foi ele, não a namorada, então eles não deveriam ter deixado entrar, eles dizem que querem falar com o traveco.

O traveco diz que o verdadeiro nome dele é o mesmo do da namorada, então na verdade ele mostrou o documento.

O hotel diz: então, a culpa não é nossa. Divirtam-se e prometemos que não contaremos nada à sua namorada, apesar de sabermos o nome dela.

O PROBLEMA É QUE:

Quando fizeram isso com o Berlusconi, a Itália quebrou e o mundo inteiro entrou em crise. Ou será que vocês já esqueceram de 2011?

Será que foram os extraterrestres que decidiram atacar a Terra? Ou será que foi um traveco - traveco, não, porque eles tem vergonha na cara. Quer dizer, alguns. Aqueles que entraram no carro do Fenômeno não tinham. Mas o cara é tão foda, mas tão foda, que para não ter que usar droga e nem pegar doença venérea, deu na cara de dois travecos enormes no banco de trás de um carro minúsculo fazendo zig-zag e ainda por cima apesar do choque, conseguiu explicar todo o acontecido para a polícia em outro idioma. Não seria por isso que eu me tornaria afim dele. Como escrevi em http://www.recantodasletras.com.br/contos/4815645 , apesar de casada, meu coração bate forte pelo Neymar  -  como ídolo. Todo mundo gosta dele porque ele é meiguinho e másculo ao mesmo tempo - Quanto ao caso Berlusconi, será então que não foi alguma maníaca terrorista que decidiu fazer o mal em troca de interesses políticos?

Não culpem a Coréia do Norte por precisar de alimentos. Eles sabem bem que quando uma mulher coreana faz esse tipo de coisa são altamente punidos, como aconteceu nos EUA nos anos 50. E também sabem que cada vez que o mundo pára, eles são os primeiros a serem prejudicados, tanto que, pouco tempo depois, tiveram que anunciar a posse de bombas atômicas porque não estavam recebendo alimentos.

A verdade, é que mulheres famosas de qualquer nacionalidade que fazem extorsão através de sexo induzido não entenderam ainda que se não são mais chamadas para trabalhar na mídia é porque nunca tiveram talento. Pois assim como os homens, a mídia não recompensa ninguém por ser somente bonitos. As modelos mais famosas do mundo são pagas pelo que elas conversam com os fotógrafos e com os executivos que pedem para acompanhá-las em aparições públicas. As que se projetam através de casos com homens são biscates sem talento, ou como diz um grande amigo: Businesscatch.

Mulheres de verdade sabem perdoar a dor deste sexo porque são boas de cama e porque sabem que o namorado sofre muito por ter que traí-las dessa forma suja. Portanto, elas não consideram isso traição. Conversam sobre isso em suas viagens para Bariloche e Uruguai.

Por favor businesscatches, fiquem longe de mim.

E playboys, aprendam yoga, para quando isso acontecer com você, você possa dizer: Sim, querida, tire a roupa e faça essa posição para mim. Dê uma aula de yoga, sem sexo para elas e diga que isso é que dá prazer a vocês. E cobrem elas depois.
Larirá.....

Thai-SP